I had returned from a walk last evening when my tween said she wanted to ask me a question. I said, ” go ahead”. Not that it would have mattered for she would have asked me anyway. “Mamma, what do I mean when I say I am looking at somebody through rose – tinted glasses”. I was the mother and I had to get it right, especially when she was giving me that challenge look. I thought a little and I said ” you’re looking at the good things in a person and not the person’s weaknesses”. So she said” good”. I then confidently said, ” it’s pretty obvious “. So the little rat says, ” fine, if it’s obvious, I will ask Didi”. Didi is how the rat refers to her elder sister with respect. My motherly instincts got into protection mode. I did not want my older one to get it wrong in front of this imp. So I said, “well, she may not get it because she is very straight forward and does not read between the lines”. A little while later when my 14 year old walked in, the rat asked her the question anyways. The older one first retorted in the usual manner ” Why should I answer you?” I wasn’t sure if she was avoiding answering because she did not know or she was being the typical older sis. My younger one coaxed her and the older one replied ” it means you are looking at the perfections in an otherwise imperfect object”. I was so relieved she got it right before the rat.It did not end there though.
The rat continued, ” you know Didi, I knew you would get it right “. She looked at me and said ” mamma you have so little faith in your children. You need to believe us a little more…”, grinning away.
Later that night I thought about it and I realized how being protective sometimes we make our children weak and under-confident. Our fear of seeing them hurt does not allow them to try new things. This I had to learn this from a 11 year old. Well, I guess it’s better late than never as they say 😊.
So have faith in your kids. They have your genes and the data is all stored in, even if you can’t see it most of the time. They will restore the file when the need arises. Give them a chance to explore, to fall, to fail and to rise again.
Until next time, happy learning 🙂
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