I celebrated my birthday last week and though many may say it’s only another day , nothing much has changed with regards to how I felt on this day when I was a child and how I feel about it now. I still need to feel loved, I still need everybody to be nice to me and I still want to be made to feel special. Before you ask me how my birthday was, well by God’s grace and fortunately for my family, I had a great day. By great, I don’t mean getting priceless gifts. I am not the kind who would say great to a birthday with no gifts. As much as I would like to be charitable, I do believe that birthdays are meant to be occasions you let the person know they are special and you care about them. It’s a sum-total of a lot of things which finally make you feel great and after loads of birthdays and loads of experiences, good, bad and ugly, here I have attempted to write the 10 sure-shot ways to have a birthday that brings you joy. Read on. You’ll not regret it.

Who doesn’t like a little attention on their birthday? I certainly do. I know my friends love it too. Now, the critic may say, “Birds of a feather flock together”, or scoff and say “What’s in a birthday? It’s just another day!”. My question to them is “How can it be just another day? It’s the day you were born, the day you took your first breath, the day you celebrate another year of living”.

 

 

Tip #1 Get yourself an account on Facebook, What’s App :

Getting a social media account ensures you get birthday wishes from people who you are connected with. If not, the FB team makes it a point to wish you and no matter what, it will make you smile. If you’re my kind, you obviously like receiving wishes. Thanks to social media these days, that’s easily taken care of. Don’t get me wrong. I am not criticizing social media and saying it’s just so easy to wish someone “Happy Birthday. It doesn’t cost a dime”. I am saying despite the busy lives people lead in these times and despite the fact that everybody’s saying that people don’t care anymore, people actually do take time to type out a birthday wish. It’s how you look at it. You can be thankful when you receive birthday wishes that are personalized, not something standardized or cut, copied and pasted. So, all is not lost and people still have hearts. It also shows, that you’ve done well in maintaining relations over the last year, so that’s something you deserve credit for. If you have not received wishes, then you know you need to make a start. What goes round, comes round, right? Forget what the naysayers say about social media.

Tip#2: Call Family if they have not called you

In today’s world, with globalization, your family could be spread all over the globe. If your family calls you great. If they don’t and you do want to speak to them, pick up the phone and speak. Don’t wait all day and feel let down. Thanks to different time zones, our chaotic lives, weather situations affecting phone lines in some parts of the world or the over- dependence on the mobile birthday reminder, you don’t need to make a big deal if somebody forgets to call.

This year, when my sister called me up to wish me and then handed over the phone to dad to wish me, he explained how his phone hadn’t been charged and so he hadn’t received the reminder :). He sounded guilty. of-course I understood. So, please if you want to be wished by somebody, call them up. If they have forgotten, remind them.  Don’t make it a reason to ruin your day or the start of a blame-game.

Tip#3: State your expectations. Don’t play the guessing game!

This is so important and many would probably read this and say “What’s the point if you need to spell it all out? Where’s the love? Why can’t everybody be as thoughtful as I am?”. Well, let’s just say, all of us are different. Some are blessed with being thoughtful. Others not so. But that doesn’t mean they don’t care. I am sure all men would agree with me on this point. How many men have suffered their wives wrath because they just did not meet up to their expectations. If we were the same, then the book “Men are from mars women are from Venus” by John Gray, wouldn’t have been a success. So, please ladies, don’t expect hubby dear or boyfriend to be the prince charming of your dreams and then go to bed feeling low. Even the Bible says “Ask and you will receive“. So make it easy for yourself and those around you. Spell out what you expect.

3 years ago, I had taken a sabbatical from work and I got involved in social service. It was extremely satisfying and soul-changing and I definitely meant it when I said, we must not waste money because there are so many others who are less privileged than us. However, when I said it, I hadn’t clarified that I did not consider spending a little on me was a waste. It was a way of showing love.

Well, that birthday was the saddest.  My family did not do a thing for me. They had got it all wrong or I had spelled out my expectations all wrong. When I questioned them the next day, they said, “You said, you did not want us to waste and we should help those in need”. I had no idea if I was to laugh or cry. That’s when I had to explain spending on somebody you love is not wasting. You must do charity but please don’t do it at my expense 🙂 .

Tip#4: Keep all those people who don’t make you feel good, away from you

At school, at work, there’s always somebody who derives pleasure in being mean. I call them the negatives in life. Keep them away. You don’t need them, certainly not when you’re determined to be happy. Sometimes you have to work with them so there’s nothing you can do about them but DO NOT let the sadists affect you.

 

Tip#5: Give and you will Receive

Helping somebody in need or celebrating your happiness by bringing a smile to somebody else’s lips is an amazing feeling. No better day to do it than on your birthday. It’s bound to make you happy, trust me.

 

Tip#6: Do something you love.

Spend sometime doing what you love. It’s extremely satisfying. I published my first guest post and it felt absolutely great.

I  started the day with a morning walk as I always do. The fresh morning air and the warm rays of the sun are sure ingredients to happiness. Nature always does me good. Maybe it’s something else for you, like spending time with friends or shopping or going to the coffee shop or the spa or just the neighborhood library or cooking or baking. Whatever it is that you love, do it!

Tip#7: Take control of your happiness and be kind to yourself

Indulge. Get yourself that dress you’ve been wanting. Go for dinner to that expensive restaurant. Don’t wait for somebody else to take the lead for your happiness. You don’t need permission to be kind to yourself.

 

Tip#8: Be Nice to people who love you. Make time for family

As much as you’d like to be with your friends on your special day, make a little time for the family. After-all you wouldn’t be here without them.

 

 

Tip#9: Let the world know it’s your birthday in advance. Remind them if you think they’ve forgotten 😉

This year, we had a office Iftar on my birthday. Iftar is when the Muslims break fast at sunset during the Holy month of Ramadan. I had to be there and dinner with family had to be postponed. In fact, going there actually turned out to be fun with the entire office singing for me. Who does not like a little attention? I do, I did; despite being the typical introvert.

Tip#10: Be Grateful and Count your Blessings

Last but not the least, be grateful for another year ahead, for your family (no family is perfect but ask someone who does not have one), for your job, even if you feel it’s not the best (because you have a job), for the year that has passed, for lessons learnt, for good times and bad. Remember, you only reap what you sow. So if you want better next year, you need to work harder at everything- at your job, at building bonds, at being a better person.

I have a few questions that I am curious about

1. What do you think- Are birthdays over-rated or do you think it’s an important day?
2. Did you ever have a birthday or birthdays, that you could look back and say, “That was the most memorable birthday one”?”
3. Did you ever wish for things to happen but they did not and you ended up feeling really low on your birthday but on hindsight you feel it could have been different, if you had done a few things differently?

 

Do share your opinions. Would love to hear if there are many around like me or is it just a Gemini trait or just a female trait or just me and a few of my friends who feel this way :).

 

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