And last but not least, our prompt (optional, as always). Today, I’d like to challenge you to write a humorous rant. In this poem, you may excoriate to your heart’s content all the things that get on your nerves. Perhaps it’s people who tailgate when driving, or don’t put the caps back on pens after they use them. Or the raccoons who get into your garbage cans. For inspiration, perhaps you might look to this list of Shakespearean insults. Or, for all of you who grew up on cartoons from the 1980s, perhaps this compendium of Skeletor’s Best Insults might provide some insight.
My poem for today, ‘Ok. I said it! – The words in italics are the insults takes from the sites provided. This felt so good 🙂
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‘2.5 lakh new corona cases,’ the headline says
‘Lockdown in state for fifteen days!’
Meant to curb the spread
as thousands wait for a hospital bed
‘Oxygen in short supply, Doctors complain’
‘Remdesivir* being sold in black market for personal gain!’
‘Delay in raw materials, vaccine stocks low’
As if this weren’t enough for us to swallow
‘Hundred thousands throng to take a dip in the Ganges’
If only covid could be fixed by sucking lozenges
Thousands test positive.’
To flout the rules, our leaders prerogative!
‘Election rallies in full swing across the country’
The electoral candidates run wild and free
“Thou art unfit for any place but hell –“
the people with a modicum of sense wish to yell
“The sin’s not accidental, but a trade.“
Did they believe they’d be cleansed, if we prayed?
I am sick when I do look on thee.”
But you’re the only news I get to see, on the papers and the TV
“Methink’st thou art a general offence and every man should beat thee.”
Ah! We wish, ‘If only that can be.’
“More of your conversation would infect my brain.”
Your words would clog the drain!
“Not worth a gooseberry. “There’s no more faith in thee than a stewed prune.”
With you we’re definitely headed to our doom
“Just as I suspected, ‘Hollow. You metal munching moron’
I got that ‘Bang on’
“Bunglers, half-wits, brainless idiots. You couldn’t even be a motley group of gnomes”
How fastidious of you to keep us locked in our homes
While you go gallivanting around town
You “flea-bitten, bird-brained” clown!
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