I miss you so bad

I thought I was done
                         missing you
You had to go            
             everybody has to           someday.
I've been telling myself 
                        and it's been okay

I feel you              closer  
             than before
those days you looked at me     
                         as if I were the traffic        
during rush hour 
               or a distant voice          a memory 

I thought I was done     
                                        missing you
But,      I am not 
            Today          I feel like a ship
that's hit a rock                  it's getting heavy
                   I feel myself keel
over                                    Helpless                     
         Frightened               I close my eyes and pray

like you've always told me          I'm going down
Thud!                           I touch the ground
       There's nowhere to go now           lower 
I feel you      I'm going up                  higher

higher                    I'm gliding
        You're hauling me            I feel the wind on my face
It's buoying me    

I'm soaring         my wings,       look
                    Mamma, can you see me?     

I wrote this poem for Eugi's prompt, 'Soaring'

A little note on the poem : 
It's been fifteen years since I lost my mother and the truth is I don't think of her very often. But, today I found myself missing her...like really missing her. Not because I was sad, but, 
because I was happy. I miss being able to share my happy news with her, I miss the way 
her eyes danced when something made me happy, and I miss hearing her rooting for me. 

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